Friday, January 3, 2014

Truth in a Nutshell

ALRIGHT, so ever since I made the list of what happened in 2013, I've been dying inside to write this post. It bugged me all last night, and then most of today, so here it is: the truth in a nutshell.


If you read my previous post, you can probably guess what this is about. If you didn't, that's cool too. Basically, it's my weird personal explanation as to why some bloggers terrify the fire cats out of me (or rather, used to).

I started blogging in 2010. When I did, there were not that many bloggers (that I knew about anyway). Actually, I thank the start of this wonderful journey to Sierra Winterbreeze (for introducing me to the world of fanfiction) and Kestrel Shadowthistle (for introducing me to the world of blogging and other bloggers and this epic community). From there, all horizons seemed reachable. I discovered some awesome people. Save those two names, I'm not going to mention any direct names (they're an exception because neither of them blog anymore).

My personality is very introverted, yet I have NO problem writing posts about my random adventures and crazy life. To think you guys actually read my stuff is an insane idea to me :p But I love you all anyway :D

Anyway, because I'm so painfully shy with talking to other people, the bigger name bloggers whom everyone looks up to and is friends with absolutely scares the blood bats out of me. Their professionalism is extremely intimidating. I'm much more likely to leave a comment on a blog that's more like mine: rambling randomness *shrugs*

For a while, my brain had this crazy notion that these intimidating bloggers weren't really other people... I would read these extremely thought out and well done posts and think, "WOW, this is awesome, I completely understand why everyone loves them." But at the same time: "Eeek, scary!"

>:(

But then, somehow, through some realistically impossible event, I became friends with two freaking awesome bloggers who, though have that cool professionalism, I look to as good friends and always feel proud of them.

And then I joined twitter. When I first learned about twitter four to six years ago, I thought it was kinda stupid sounding... But the W101 FB community is scary in it's own, actually scary way. So I gave twitter a try. By now, I had somehow mysteriously gained more readers and met more bloggers, and I knew they were there, so I gave it a try.


Best. Decision. Of. My. Life.

(Besides slapping a kid when I was little. He later became my best friend in the world. That's another story :p)


I got this peep into all those big name bloggers lives and realized that these people are just as crazy as I am. I would look between their blog and their twitter feed and be blown away. Suddenly, I became WAY less intimidated by their professionalism. Sure, I still admired it, and those I knew personally I still feel proud of, but that feeling of intimidation is GONE.

In truth, this also has to do with growing older and being introduced to more of the real world. Two years ago I was painfully insecure. It took a while to learn that shyness doesn't always protect you, it can harm you. I took a leap of faith and jumped out of my shell, and I don't regret it. Chances are we're all going to be there sooner or later or again or return -- we're all human, even bloggers, obviously I'm not the only one who's gone through it.

Seriously though, if you know you're in a community like the W/P101 one, we love you before we even know you, so don't waste our love!! I've come to realize that online people are just as awesome and IRL ones (minus the pedophiles).


So there's my heartfelt explanation as to why I call you people lovely people :p

Just because I don't start the conversation doesn't mean I don't care. I'm still struggling on some shyness issues (thankfully, you guys don't get to see me turn beat red and grin like an idiot every time I'm noticed or praised. I'm always way too touched beyond words XD).


I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SPILLED THE BEANS.

ALL OF THEM,

THEY'RE SPILLED.

...Ah, they look better on the floor anyway.


Laterz!
~Emma


P.S.
And then this song came on the radio.
"Perfect," I thought ;)

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